Miss, Missing, Missed

One recent revelation of mine is that you are always missing out, being missed or missing someone. 

What if I was a different major? It would have changed everything. GPA, friends, relationships. Grades and friends are obvious. Classes would be different along with course load. Social groups are primarily founded on mutual interests. But relationships? What about Tall, Dark & Handsome? Our brief fling was interrupted by the end of school and gossip. Would we have ever met? 

If I had a different group of friends I wouldn't have needed to find a sub-let. Party Girl and I would never have met and I would never have met Mr. Nice Guy. 

Also...you will all miss someone or something. Personally - it's always someONE. Although, at present moment, it is both.

You've been gone for approximately 3.5 weeks. Thats three sessions, one Fest, 15 classes and way to many nights alone. It scares me how much I miss you. But another scary fact is how I can see myself without you. Even as I type this up. I cringe. If you ever read this - I'd die. Overall, I know I need you in one way or another. You are wonderful. Any unease in the upcoming months can be attributed to venturing into uncharted territory with a very guarded heart.

This is something I hope you understand and you miss me as much as I miss you. I know you do...

Future

Today I went into Steve's office and, following Ryan's advice, asked Steve about Hearst publications. Hearst is the national media mogul that owns WISN-TV. Steve said the magazine arm and the TV arm are pretty disconnected (not like I was  surprised at all). He said I was better of going out on my own, finding contacts and then "name dropping like crazy." He seemed very optimistic that he, or at least my connections to Hearst, will help. 

Hearst owns about 20 or so national magazines. Examples include: Cosmopolitan, Teen, Esquire, Country Living, Town & Country: TRAVEL!*, O: The Oprah Magazine, Seventeen, Redbook and SmartMoney. The Town & Country: TRAVEL magazine would probably be my favorite. I don't know if I could see myself at Cosmopolitan or something ultra feminine like that. Perhaps Seventeen if I had to be in that genre. 

Either way, I'd just be glad to get my foot in the door. Although, all of these jobs (with the exception of Teen with is in California) they are all New York based. Which means, I'm at an entry level job making 40 grand a year and living in New York. 

A girl's gotta start somewhere, right?

Magazines don't start hiring until early April so that means the job application process wouldn't start until after January 1. While I'd like to have solid leads by Christmas or even Thanksgiving this will give me more time to work on my portfolio. I'll have my 15,000 word essay done and possibly published by then along with clips from The Tribune and StudentCommitment.com. Steve has taken over the SC:2008 project and said today that he wants me to be one of the main recruiters and reporters. He said he would give me some really good stories and help boost my portfolio.  Hopefully things will be looking up come December. 

Not that they are looking down now...

It is more of a tunnel and I'm too far in to turn around.